Happy Birthday, America!
An Unabashed Love Letter
The United States of America turns 250 today. Happy birthday, baby.
I’ve never thought of myself as a patriot, but on this monumental occasion, I am proud to be an American.
In recent years, my appreciation for this country has only deepened. While so many people have become more disaffected by this nation, I have become more grateful for it.
Why? Many reasons. I choose to see our strengths rather than our flaws. I have adopted an attitude of gratitude toward life, and I apply that to our country, too.
Watching the desperation in many parts of the world, I root down further into appreciation. There is so much to be grateful for:
Our right to vote
Our democratic process
These wild, rich, sprawling lands
The industry that booms here
Our ability to practice a variety of religions
The freedom of men to marry men, women to marry women, and men to marry women
The rivers, lakes, mountains and forests
The cosmopolitan cities and humble country towns
The fact that I can wear what I want, say what I want, and be who I want.
Capitalism. Yes, I love it. I am grateful for the right to practice entrepreneurship, serve my gifts, and be rewarded. I have no beef with capitalism. I know this makes me a heretic among many, but I stand by it.
Have you ever heard of the Law of Attraction? Some people think it’s a woo-woo concept that only spiritual seekers subscribe to. But it’s not. Whether you believe in it or not, the Law of Attraction is a fundamental universal principle. Quantum physics is the leading-most scientific authority on how this principle works, but it has been recognized by seers and sages since time immemorial.
The Law of Attraction says that like attracts like. Your energetic signature, whether it is chronically joyful and appreciative, or typically angry and blameful, will determine the type of experiences you have. If you are convinced that a country is:
Wicked
Wrong
Immoral
Illegitimate
…You will only see those aspects of that country. You are the algorithm. Your beliefs filter out anything that fundamentally opposes them. This is the essence of confirmation bias.
So if you are convinced that America (or any other country) is racist, greedy and corrupt, guess what? You’ll find that! Those racist, greedy, corrupt aspects of the country will reveal themselves to you.
But if you choose to seek the good in a country:
The freedoms it permits
The justice it strives to uphold
The innovative, creative. generous nature of its citizens and organizations
…You will find that, too.
What are you looking for? And if you are determined to look for the worst… Why?
Looking for the best in a country, person, or situation takes practice. If you are chronically focused on its shortcomings, it will take more work for you to shift. It’s easier to fall into the grooves of thought we already have. But if you value something- like a country or a relationship- you will work to improve your experience of it.
As a parent, I know that the energy I put into my kids is the energy I will get back. This is why I flood them with love and appreciation. They are the most buoyant, healthy, joyful kids I know. I have always looked for the best in them, and I have always found it. My belief in their goodness is unshakeable, and has become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
But if I were to criticize them constantly, highlight every misstep, and focus exclusively on what they were doing wrong, do you think they would thrive? Of course not. They would wither.
Matter responds to energy, regardless of the form. So whether I am leveling criticism at a child, political party, or nation, I am not participating in the greatness of it. I am degrading it. Full stop.
You say you want change? Be the change. Look for the good. Appreciate this land, in all of its beauty and imperfection. You’re allowed to see the flaws, but don’t get stuck there. That’s an immature spiritual perspective. You can do better than that. Participate in building up what is good, not tearing down what is bad. That second orientation never works, anyway.
For most of my adult life, I was a raging liberal. It never occurred to me that I might not always identify that way. And frankly, I don’t identify with either political party now. I just follow what feels true. Sometimes that falls on the left, sometimes that falls on the right.
But in my left-leaning days, I took on certain beliefs that no longer feel true. For instance, I believed that the American flag was somehow dirty, that it represented those conservatives over there. Eww.
At the height of my wokeness, I remember a friend saying that she was embarrassed to fly the American flag. I agreed with her, believing that by flying the flag I would be insinuating that I liked him- The One Who Should Never Be Named.
Now? I don’t give a damn. I ordered an American flag recently and asked my husband to install it on our front porch. It arrived yesterday, and we displayed it proudly, just in time for America’s big birthday.
A flag means different things to different people. To some, my American flag might signify colonization, racism, and the evils of capitalism. To me, it represents freedom, vision, and sovereignty. You choose what a symbol means to you. Just because you don’t like the guy in office, or aspects of our history or foreign policy, it doesn’t mean that the entire country is trash. Come on, now. You’re smarter than that.
(And incidentally, I don’t mind the guy in office too much, anymore. I know, I know, I must be a horrible person. But what’s actually happened is that I’ve chosen to focus differently. My rabid fear and anger have dissolved. So while I didn’t vote for him, I do get a kick out of him sometimes. I mean, that YMCA dance? Come ON!)
Let me close by saying this:
Your country is what you make of it. Your habit of appreciating it or degrading it will become your reality. You can be passive and bitter, bitching about our leadership, policies, and shortcomings, or you can be an active creator, growing practices and traditions that feel life-giving to you. I’ll be in the second camp, flying my American flag and feeling pride for so much of what we are doing right.
That’s not because I am blind, or unwilling to look into the shadows. I’m quite adept at that. But I also have other skills. I know that my attention creates my reality, and that my attention contributes to the whole. I take that responsibility seriously, and therefore I focus intentionally and with great discernment. Attention is food- it grows whatever it is focused upon. So I choose to focus on what is working, and what I want to create.
Over the years, I have seen many variations of a similar quote. It goes something like this:
Everyone knows what you’re fighting against- show us what you’re fighting FOR.
What are you fighting for? What is your dream for America?
I look forward to hearing your answers. And in the meantime, I’ll be jumping feet-first into a summer of passionate gardening, chaotic road trips, and endless creative projects. I will celebrate the Blue Angels booming overhead, and float down the Lazy River with my children. I will dance to country music, and wear racy bikinis because I can.
Tonight, I will stare up in wonder at the fireworks, and cry during the Star-Spangled Banner. I will allow my love of this country to move through my entire body, unabashed and unapologetic. Loving your country is not a flaw, nor a misguided pursuit. Hating it is.
Love on, friends ✌️
Very interesting and thought provoking - thanks for sharing!!
Thank you, Sarah. I feel so resonant with this piece! Happy Birthday & God Bless America!